I didn't journal for months.
Every time I thought about it, I'd tell myself: "I'm a deep thinker. I process internally. I don't need to write things down."
It sounded reasonable. Intellectual, even.
But one night, I finally asked myself the real question:
"What am I actually avoiding?"
And the answer made me uncomfortable:
I was afraid of putting my thoughts on paper because they might define me.
Writing them down would make them real. Concrete. Something I could be judged for.
So I kept everything vague in my head. Wandering. Unclear.
I called it "deep thinking."
But here's what was really happening:
My mind was keeping my thoughts vague on purpose.
Because vague thoughts can't be pinned down. They can't define you. They can't make you visible.
And if you're not visible, you can't be judged.
I was trading clarity for safety.
The moment I saw that pattern, everything shifted.
Because here's the thing most people miss:
The thoughts that stay inside alter you the most.
You can't arrive at clarity just by thinking in your head. You need to translate your thoughts into real words on real paper.
And if that feels like it's narrowing your perspective or boxing you in?
That's exactly why your mind is resisting it.
Your mind wants to wander because wandering feels safe.
Clarity feels like exposure.
So you avoid it. You tell yourself you're "reflecting" or "processing" or "thinking deeply."
But you're not.
You're protecting yourself from being defined. From being seen. From being judged.
This is a pattern.
And like all patterns, once you see it, you can't unsee it.
So here's my question for you:
What are you keeping vague on purpose?
What thoughts are you letting wander in your head instead of pinning them down?
What clarity are you avoiding because it would make you visible?
You don't need more time to think.
You need to write.
— Jasir
P.S. This is the kind of pattern I help entrepreneurs identify in their business. The invisible protection mechanisms that look like "strategy problems" but are actually something deeper. If you want help seeing what you can't see yourself, reply to this email with "PATTERN" and let's talk.